Funny Christmas Sweatshirts for Adults: 7 Retro Animal Crewnecks
A funny Christmas sweatshirt is easier to wear than a novelty sweater. It's soft, it goes in the wash and it works for a work party, a family photo or a slow morning on the couch. It also makes a good gift for the person who's always cold.
These are the seven crewneck sweatshirts in our shop right now. Each one has a retro illustrated animal getting Christmas a little bit wrong. They're unisex crewnecks with a relaxed fit, and each one is printed to order. All seven start at $26.49, and larger sizes cost a bit more.
For the cat person
Funny Cat Christmas Sweatshirt: Undecorating In Progress Tuxedo Cat Crewneck
A tuxedo cat undecorating the tree, one ornament at a time. Anyone who has put up a tree with a cat in the house will get it right away.
For the one who guards the good ornaments
Funny Chicken Christmas Sweatshirt: Don't Touch The Good Ornaments Hen Crewneck
A stern hen with a clear message: "Don't Touch The Good Ornaments." It suits whoever hangs the fragile ornaments themselves, and anyone with backyard chickens.
For the dog person
A pug squeezed into a stocking: "Fits In The Stocking. Mostly." An easy pick for pug owners, or anyone whose dog thinks every present is theirs.
For the friend who's always cold
A penguin wearing every scarf it owns. It's more of a winter joke than a Christmas one, so it can be worn well into February. It's also a safe choice for a coworker.
Retro winter picks
A possum playing dead till spring. It's for the person who would rather hibernate through December.
A frog soaking in a mug of cocoa, with the words "Cocoa Is My Hot Tub." Cozy and a little absurd.
A raccoon tangled in a string of Christmas lights: "I Did The Lights Myself." It's a good fit for whoever ends up on the ladder every year.
Picking a sweatshirt
- For a work party: the penguin and the hen are the most neutral jokes here.
- For after the holidays: the penguin, possum and frog designs are about winter, not Christmas, so they don't have to go back in the closet on December 26.
- Sizing: these are unisex with a relaxed fit. Check the size chart on the product page. Size up for a roomier fit.
- Make it a set: the cat, hen, pug and penguin also come as tees and mugs. See our funny Christmas mugs.
When to order
Every sweatshirt is printed after you order it. That takes 2–7 business days, plus carrier shipping time. For Christmas (Friday, December 25), we suggest ordering by about December 7. If you want to wear it to a holiday party, count back from the party date instead. These are suggestions, not guarantees, and carriers get slower in December.
Want a tee instead? See our funny animal holiday gifts, our gifts for cat lovers and our gifts for dog lovers.
Order-by suggestions (not guarantees): for Thanksgiving (Thu, Nov 26, 2026), order by about Nov 9 to be safe. For the first night of Hanukkah (Fri, Dec 4, 2026), order by about Nov 16. For Christmas (Fri, Dec 25), order by about Dec 7. Carriers get slower in December, so earlier is better.